Nothing Matters and why should it?

     I don't know.
     All it seems to be about is to do the things you really want to do, and to get really good at it.
     Also, to enjoy what you do seems to be a priority; otherwise, what is the point?
     There isn't much point at all after that.

     I often wonder at the people who glance at what I am doing.  I am glad I can provide a moment of entertainment, but it always feels intrusive.

     I am preparing for war at home.  I have lots of Magic cards that I am working on.
 
     I am rethinking my art career, too.

     My body still feels like I haven't woken up yet.  I need to move around.  My thoughts still don't seem fluid, and it is 3:26 in the afternoon.

     There are a couple of cute girls that just walked in, and are setting up their laptops, so I can't leave now.  I've just been given a new reason to stay.  One of them is a nice looking blond, dressed in black.  I like that look a lot.
     There is a drive I have inside to write longer and longer blogs.  Once I get people here, I want to give them the good stuff, so they stay.  I don't want to let them down.  I want to make it worth their time, because time is valuable.
     There is only so much talk I can have with the guys.  Then it starts to become about doing something else.
     It is fun to hang out with the guys, though.  We talk about funny stuff.  It's always good to revisit high school, and just pretend you are standing in the parking lot talking about stupid stuff.  Many moments of education can come from that.  Also, it is good for humans to hang out with other humans at some point during the day, and to get some exposure to actual real sunlight.  It is good for you.

     I am an individual, and I have to stand up for myself.  No one else will.  Therefore, I have to become a self-promoting bastard, and do what I need to in order to survive.
     If I thought it would work, on every blog entry, I would be asking people to send me money, but there is no point in doing that.  For one thing, it wouldn't work.  I don't have an audience yet on my blogs anyhow.
     I do have to figure out at some point what it is that I am doing, though.
     I just don't know yet.
     Well, I hope I find it soon, because no one will do it for me.
     It seems that I am starting to move into 'freewriting' territory.  Not a bad place to be.  It is where the ideas flow.
     I don't seem to be in The Land of Cohesive Ideas.  I still feel like I am in need of waking up.
     Then again, I haven't done yoga in a while, so I am starting to feel the side effects of not doing it.
     I guess I could give myself a class.
     I do have videos to make.
     I like to play Monopoly Millionaires every day now, for just a bit, as an escape. 
     I read some stuff philosophically about traveling around in a circle, and enjoying the ride.
     There is no need to go anywhere.
     The blog entry should reflect that in our search for truth.
     Also, the idea was introduced that I could write stuff that might actually be of interest to somebody else.
     I could actually write stuff that might be helpful.  Wow, that is an idea.

     I would love to make $100 a day from my web activities, but first, I have to make $1 a day.  It is something to go for.  It all takes time you know.  Everything does.  I guess that is my greatest lesson, which is to find something you like to do, and never quit no matter what.
     People can stop you from doing what you want to do.  Well, don't listen to them.  They will destroy you only to make themselves feel better.
     I have no problem shoving my joy onto people.  I don't care.  It's better than them dumping their misery on to me.  They will do it, too.
     The current term is 'haters'.  I have no time for trolls.
     Anyway, life is good, and I am enjoying it.  My biggest problem is just getting some funding to happen.  I have to find a way, otherwise, nobody will see me on this blog anymore.  I will be good and dead, and I don't want that to happen just yet.  I have to prevent it from happening.
     I like that I can edit all this later.
     I am a person who likes to show it all, and let it all hang out, just to see what will happen.
     I haven't put any naked pictures of myself on the web yet.  I don't want to frighten people too much, haha.  That would be atrocious.
     I did see a porn from the 80's last night.  I was fascinated.  Everyone was so...hairy.  haha.  The mood and the lighting was completely different, and they tried to make it all into some kind of a story, lol.
     Nowadays, they just want it fast, and they want it now.
     Okay, there is the girl, underwear, naked, sex, the guy does his thing, and that is it...haha.
     Anyway, I can't talk about that stuff too much here.  Adsense's ever watchful eye is on me.  Also, somebody might complain.
     The one thing that is good about words is that women really like words.  You can't really argue with words, as long as you have enough of them.
     With visual art, sometimes it becomes all about liking or not liking something, and that gets to be a little bit too easy, and really stupid, and ignorant.
     Sometimes, young people are absolutely right about things, and a lot of times, they are absolutely wrong.
     People innately know what is of quality and what isn't, though.
     I hope someday my work will be good.  As I mentioned before, it just takes time.

     So what is it that I am doing right now?  I am trying to delve deep into myself, and to find what is there.

     The title for this blog is a working title, for lack of anything else to call it.  I like the title, it works for me.  It is basic, and to the point.  Lots of people go to cafes, so they can relate.  The cafe I go to is one of a billion on this planet.
     I've never liked the corporate cafes, though.
     Even this one where I am now is independent.
     I like it that way.
     Corporations don't need any of my money, they get enough from other sources.
     My problem is that I need to get some money coming my way.  I'm going to have to make some more art pets.
     I haven't gotten any art sales in a while, because, well, I haven't been trying.  I guess I am going to have to try again.
     It's been such a mess in there lately, I'm barely able to hear myself think.
     "My, my, she is a cutie," as I glance over at the blond in black jeans and cowboy boots.
     "My word," I add.
     "My, what a wonderful evening it would be, hanging out with her."

     You see, I have a pulse.  I don't ignore people.  I notice.  It is much better than being dead.
     Some people are the walking dead, and I ain't even kidding.
     Look hard, and you will see them.
     It might be a teacher, it might be your wife, or your boss.
     Some people become a shell of themselves.
     Watch out so you don't become that.

     So, to answer the question in the title of this blog, and to come full-circle, "Yes, you don't want to become a mind-dead, bloodless bastard."